Type 9

Type 9 ~ The Mediator


Your Basic Proposition

The original blissful state of unconditional love and union in which everyone belongs equally goes into the background in a world that you perceive makes you unimportant or has you blend in. You come to believe that, as a substitute for your own worth, you can gain belonging and comfort by attending to and merging with others and by dispersing energy into substitute objects. Concurrently, you develop inertia (self-forgetting) about your own priorities and limits. Your attention naturally goes to others’ and environmental claims made upon you. Narcotization glues the structure together by helping you to “numb out” and keep life comfortable. Your ultimate concern or fear is being dismissed, not worth keeping, or, experientially speaking, annihilated. As compensation, you sometimes control by becoming stubborn (dug in), resistant, intractable, diverted into inessentials, going along and resenting it, or seeming to go along and not, and avoiding conflict and decisions.


What stresses you and makes you most personally reactive: Being forced to take a position or face conflict; being pushed into action; having to say no to a claim made upon you; and being treated as unimportant.

These reactions block you from experiencing unconditional love and ultimately, taking essential action that truly supports your life.

Your Strengths: Being caring, attentive to others, giving, empathetic, adaptive, accepting, supportive, participative, accountable, sensing, steady, calming, receptive and generally non-judgmental.

The Central Theme for Your Healing and Development: You tend to focus on environmental claims and experience yourself as reacting primarily to others and events outside yourself. The fact that you have lost touch with your inner separate self in favor of adapting to the environment and merging with others becomes the central issue for your healing and development. You struggle fundamentally with gaining or reclaiming a separate self that feels loved equally to all others. Thus, your main task is awakening to yourself, literally to love yourself from a personal reference point for which there is no substitute and to establish your own priorities and timelines instead of falling into comfortable secondary pursuits and getting resistant to over-influence.

 


Strategies for Your Self-Development and Fulfillment Relationships
  • Practice loving yourself as you would others
  • Take responsibility for your own well-being and importance
  • Reclaim a separate self and voice; take a personal position on issues
  • Establish and adhere to your own agenda and priorities
  • Welcome discomfort and conflict; knowing that digging in means you have a position
  • Recognize anger in its many forms since it’s a signal that something is important to you

 


How Others Can Assist Your Relationship Development
  • Encourage your Mediators to pay attention to their own selves and needs, express their thoughts and opinions, and welcome in discomfort and change.
  • Provide your Nines with a supportive environment for determining priorities, taking action and experiencing anger
  • Ask your Nines what they want, need, and value
  • Help them keep their own focus and limits